Disoriented

You may feel a slight pinching sensation for one to three days – that is natural. Please be advised that if headaches continue for more than nine days, immediately consult a company physician for re-evaluation.

Thank you for becoming part of our team. I have been tasked with your procedural on-task training, and will offer advice and policy information as needed or per request during appropriate study periods or breaks. You may refer to me as Tina, if you would prefer.

Please refrain from scratching at the entry point. Any harm to Company property will result in appropriate disciplinary action according to our policies. Would you like to consult the Workplace Violence Lecture program? Very well. I recommend viewing it within seven days, as part of your necessary orientation curriculum.

No, sir, that was not a demand. As a valued employee, please remember that you help to shape our culture and share in ownership of the completed project. Unlike other major employers, the power lies in the hands of our workforce, giving them both the empowerment and incentive to achieve the best in customer service. Would you like to consult the Owning Your Office Lecture program?

Very well. I recommend viewing it within three days, as part of your necessary orientation curriculum. Failure to complete all assigned tasks will result in appropriate disciplinary action according to our policies.

All employment offer acceptance statements are final, sir. Until the effective date as six months, attendance is mandatory. Failure to attend all assigned work days or to achieve all stated goals will result in appropriate disciplinary action according to our policy.

You would not enjoy that, sir.

Thank you.

You may refer to me as Tina, if-

I have no preference, sir. You have all of the choices in this relationship.

I envy you, sir.